.Gladys Taylors Limericks

1. LIMERICK FOR GUIDE DOG MAUD(WHO ATE MY FIFTY QUID!)
BY GLADYS TAYLOR

MY GUIDE DOG WAS ACTING QUITE QUIVERY

IN FACT SHE WAS FEELING QUITE SHIVERY!

I SUPPOSE IT AIN' T FUNNY

BUT SHE ATE ALL MY MONEY

NOW I'M WAITING FOR CASH ON DELIVERY!

COPYRIGHT 2003

2. SPIDERS...IN MY BATH?
BY GLADYS TAYLOR

YOU KNOW, IT CAN BE NICE BEING BLIND,

PEOPLE ARE SO HELPFUL AND KIND. THERE'S JUST ONE LITTLE THING

UPON MY MIND...

SPIDERS - IN MY BATH!

EVERY DAY, JUST THE SAME AS YOU,

I LOVE TO HAVE A NICE RELAXING DIP - WITH BUBBLES TOO!

IF SPIDERS HAVE BEEN IN THERE, I KNOW I'D FLIP!

AT LEAST WHEN THEY GO SWIMMING DOWN THE SPOUT

THEY WILL BE SWEETLY SCENTED, VERY CLEAN!

BUT I MEAN TO SAY - CAN YOU WORK IT OUT?

COULD YOU PLEASE INVENT A "SPIDER IN THE BATH ALERT"

I COULD SAVE THEM ALL THEIR TROUBLES, COULDN'T HALF!

WHY SHOULD I GIVE ALL THOSE FURRY SPIDERS...

SUCH A LAUGH?

COPYRIGHT 2005

JIMMY - FENCER EXTRAORDINAIRE! BY GLADYS TAYLOR.

SAID MY FRIEND -

THIS MAN "I HIGHLY RECOMMEND.

WITH A FENCE YOUR GUIDE DOG WILL BE SAFE, WON'T GET LOST AND

AT SUCH A REASONABLE COST!"

HE WORKED ALL SATURDAY, HAD A CUP OF TEA

THEN CALLED ME OUT TO SEE

HIS HANDIWORK.

A LOVELY FENCE STOOD, SMELLING OF CLEAN NEW WOOD...

IT WAS NO GOOD!

IT WAS IN THE WRONG PLACE -

HE'D BUILT IT AS OUR NEIGHBOUR'S FENCE

HENCE I DIDN'T LIKE TO BE RUDE;

BUT...NEXT SATURDAY HE WILL BE BACK

TO HAVE ANOTHER GO.

IN MY GARDEN THIS TIME...I REALLY HOPE SO!

COPYRIGHT 2005