Poems by Nelferch Merchoed
Abyss
to a lost friend
You do not want to hear the word from me
which is not love itself.
So I will speak the loving word.
But deep down I know, you know
That you despise me
For my Love.
I will avert my eyes and will not close my hands
So that I will not feel how they stay empty;
For deep down I know, you know:
You take, but do not give.
I will not feel and won’t ask any questions,
You don’t have to admit you used me like a tool.
Deep down I know, you know:
You want to form me
According to your will,
Breaking me first and then rebuilding me.
I will not speak - this time, and will pretend
I am aware of nothing.
But deep down I know you know
How you ill-used me
For you despised me for my Love,
And feared the strength my Love would give.
I will not tell you of my Love – this time,
And so you may pretend I am acceptable.
But deep down I know you know
That I am loved, though you despise me.
My hands are filled, though you give nothing.
I am not broken, and my spirit’s free,
My heart filled by my Love.
And you can hear:
I still can speak the loving word.
Deep down you know:
This is my true Love’s gift to me
who you despise so much.